"So when does it get too hot, Doc?" "Oh, about 3 o'clock in the
morning. Makes it a tossup. Do you get up early without the benefit
of coffee and conversation and go weed the petunias with a
flashlight, or just stay up late and party and weed them before
going to bed?"
"Is this a multiple choice, Doc?" said Steve, ever the practical
cowboy. "Was this a rhetorical question, or can we pick for you?"
"Those must be powerfully important petunias," said Dud.
"How do you feel about naps, Doc?"
There followed a general round of merriment among the august
members of the Mule Barn truck stop's philosophy counter and world
dilemma think tank.
"You know," Doc said, drawing on his philosophical voice, "I
sometimes think it's a better idea to just go Darwinian and revert
to native plants. Survival of the fittest. Allow the kinds of things
to grow in our yards that really want to grow in our yards. It would
be holistic with a splash of organic and natural tossed in.
"And what would it hurt? There you'd have this yard full of
plants that really wanted to be there. Big, strapping healthy
plants. Plants well suited to our environment. Plants that wouldn't
have to be weeded and mollycoddled and fussed about. Plants that
would stand up and tell the world 'I'm here. I'm strong, and I
belong here in Doc's yard.'"
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Dud looked at him. "Great idea, but how do you go about doing
this?"
"Why, Dudley, ol' bean," Doc said, grinning, "that's the very
best part. You don't do one simple darn thing. Nothing. No plowing,
irrigating, fertilizing, planting, hoeing, pruning... nothing. I may
have to write a book on it someday."
Dud was still a bit perplexed. "But Doc, if you don't weed these
native plants, won't the weeds take over?"
"Weeds? The only weed you might get is a stray rosebush, my
friend. The weeds of yesteryear are the treasures of tomorrow!"
Dud started to smile. "I get it now."
"And Dud?" added Steve, "Doc can get this magnificent yard of his
while he's asleep at 3 o'clock in the morning."
[Slim Randles]
For more of Slim's writing, visit
www.slimrandles.com.
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