On Earth...

In Matt. 6:10, Jesus calls us to pray with words like this: "Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth, as it is in heaven." "On earth..." messages are the reflection of various local writers sharing common experiences in daily living and then guiding renewal of the mind and spirit from God's Word. It is scheduled to appear on Wednesdays and Saturdays.

Here Am I, Send Me

My Secret Sin

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[February 27, 2008]  Fond memories remain of a young boy's weekly trek with his mother to downtown Lincoln. This was before shopping centers. The two of them would make their way around the square, which then contained shops with every kind of item needed, ending at the A&P grocery store.

On one of these occasions, they wandered off the square to visit a shoe repair shop to have a pair of shoes resoled. Yes, there was a time when new soles were put on old shoes.

While the mother was conducting her business, a pocketknife display case caught the boy's attention. Looking in the case, he was immediately mesmerized by a slick-looking, white-handled pocketknife with a subtle reverse curve. It was the most gorgeous knife ever. The white pearl said, "Touch me"; the glistening chrome said, "Take me home." But was there a chance his parents would ever allow him to have this knife? A slim chance?

The knife captured his entire attention. Then, he saw a button on the side of the knife and realized it was a SWITCHBLADE. His heart was beating so hard the pounding sound had to be audible. No other knife could be any more desirable.

Now the agony and the ecstasy set in. Being a switchblade made it the most coveted thing in the world, but it also made it unattainable, because his father would never allow him to have it. So... with the obsession, a plot began to be formed.

The next time they went to town, the boy volunteered to go to the shoe repair shop to pick up the repaired shoes. Elation had to be controlled when his mother agreed to let him pick up the shoes and then meet her at the grocery store. He ran... ran to the shop and purchased the knife (this would be an illegal act by the shopkeeper today).

Now began the secret part. If his father discovered his purchase, the punishment would be severe and the knife would be gone. The decision was made to find a secret hiding place. A routine of deception began. When alone, he would go to the hiding place, look at the knife, flick it open with the button, close it, flick it open again, and just feel it and look at it. That was all he could do. Then he would return it to the hiding place.

After awhile, fears of the knife being discovered led him to change the hiding place. The changing of the hiding place occurred several times. Over time, the visits to the hiding place became less frequent because all he could really do was look at the knife and flick it open.

Then, one day he went to the hiding place and the knife was not there. Where could it be? Had he forgot the latest hiding place? A frantic search ensued, but the knife was not found.

As time progressed, the thought of the secret knife would surface and another search would be initiated, but the knife was never found. After awhile, even the memory of the knife faded and then was lost. His family moved, he became an adult and moved out of the home, and the episode of the beautiful but secret white switchblade knife was over.

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Go forward in time 52 years. The boy's father had died two years earlier, and his mother had just passed on also. Family members gathered at the nursing home to clean out and disperse the mother's personal belongings. The boy began to empty a dresser drawer, where he found a box. In the box were several things, including a smaller box. Inside the smaller box, in a pull-string pouch, was the beautiful white pearl-handled switchblade knife.

The now 59-year-old man gasped!

Absolutely stunned!

Speechless!

Once again, the knife had his entire attention. He felt it, caressed it and flicked it open. Then all the memories of the knife came back. He remembered all the deception involved in hiding his secret knife. Conviction and embarrassment engulfed him as his adult view considered the boy's concealed, secret sin.

But, what had happened? Most probably, the mother found the knife but did not tell the son and did not tell the father... She just put it away. She probably intended to give it back to the son when he was older, but forgot about it.

Think about the wisdom and grace the mother displayed. She did not confront the boy, she did not condemn the boy, she did not expose his secret sin to anybody, and she did not stop loving him. She put herself between the son and certain paternal punishment. She took the boy's sin on herself and assumed the risk of the hidden forbidden object.

Because of the sacrificial crucifixion of Jesus Christ for me, God the Father does not confront or condemn me for my sin. Jesus' blood covers my sin so that it is as though it never happened. If Satan accuses me, Jesus steps in to intercede for me by saying, "The price has been paid," so do not accuse my brother. And yes, I was the young boy.

All of us probably have some personal failure that we do not want exposed. So... James 5:16: "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed."

Prayer: Father, forgive me of that particular sin that I kept secret. I confess that sin to you now, although to you, it's not a secret. I desire to go forward without having to hide anything and without the deception that pokes and taunts my conscience. I want to be free from hidden things and will be open to inspection from your Holy Spirit.

Halleluiah!

[HERE AM I, SEND ME]

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