 "Are you crazy, Benny! The robins haven't even come back yet! Go
back to sleep!""Don't you see, Bert? We can get a jump on the
honey-making, hive development and baby bee production if we get up
and out a little earlier this year than our next-hive neighbors."
"It's too cold."
"That's what's weird, Bert. It's not cold. And the flowers are
all blooming. Let's go!"
"Grrrph... All right..."
Flying over the landscape we witness winter's ravages: the brown
grass, the mud, the naked trees.
"So where are all the flowers, Benny? Huh?"
"Look! There's one!"
"You got me out of a cozy hibernation for one lousy daffodil?"
"Well, OK, so the buds haven't quite opened yet, but we can still
work on hive development, right?"
"Look! A human! Let's go buzz him!"
Buzzing is one of Bert's favorite things to do. It's not the part
about flying directly into a human's face that excites him. It's all
that dancing and swatting a human does after having been buzzed.
There was something different about this particular human,
though. He was carrying something big. He raised it, pointed it at a
squirrel and projected a mighty stream of water in its direction.
The squirrel dived for cover.
It was a high-powered squirt gun. Wow... We don't usually
encounter this type of advanced weaponry until at least June.
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 Before I could warn Bert, he was already in buzzing formation and
had a lock on his target.
It was a successful buzz as the human danced and swatted to the
unholy glee of Bert, but then... the weapon was locked and loaded
and aimed at my friend.
It was time for me to go in. I buzzed past the little human's
right ear just as he pulled the trigger. The shot went wide and Bert
escaped the fierce onslaught. The water rained harmlessly down to
the deck where the human was standing.
Bert, having more brawn than brains, decided to have another go
at the fellow to teach him a lesson that, hopefully, would stick
with him all summer:
Never mess with bees.
Bert took a test fly, high above the human, scoping out the
situation. The boy fired straight up, and the water came straight
down and soaked him. I wondered how prudent it was to make the
half-man mad. As the human took a bead on my friend once more, I
flew into action again.
"Bzzzzzz!"
The squirt gun went flying. I dodged a flurry of flailing hands
and arms and then the funniest thing happened...
The water had made the deck so slippery and the human's feet were
moving so rapidly that, after his flight instinct kicked in, the
momentum literally floored him.
One minute he was on his feet doing the whole dancing and
swatting thing. The next, he was flat on his back with a stunned
look on his face.
With a midair victory bump, Bert and I flew away laughing our
stingers off. What a great way to start the season!
[By LAURA SNYDER]
Laura Snyder is a nationally syndicated columnist,
author and speaker. You can reach her at
lsnyder@lauraonlife.com
or visit www.lauraonlife.com
for more info. |
