Slim Randles' Home Country

Night chat about the day job

[December 03, 2011]  The photo of Emily Stickles sat on the nightstand next to Dewey's bed. They weren't yet to the stage in their relationship, if that's what they have, where they pose for a picture together or where he could ask her for one. That would be a dead giveaway, of course, that he looked on her as more than a... professional counselor? Yeah, maybe.

What he had done is find the county's employees on the Internet and then had conned Dud's wife, Anita Campbell, into turning Emily's mug shot into something he could frame. He blew it a kiss and turned off the light. Two hours later, his phone rang.

"Dewey? Emily. I hope you don't mind me calling this late."

"No problem." He sat up in bed and switched on the light.

"It's just that I was wondering something...."

Oh wow. She's wondering something, Dewey thought. She's wondering if we could have dinner again tomorrow night. She's wondering if I like children.

"Yes, Emily?

"Well, I was wondering if you ever dream about... you know, cow manure?"

Dewey stifled his laughter and disappointment. Hey, this is the little game we play, I guess.

"Actually, I do, sometimes. I'm shoveling it into a truck. Sometimes it's very difficult because the manure fork is really big, and I dream it's twice that big and my back aches...."

"Wait a minute while I get some paper.... So you're saying this fixation of yours has become a burden, right? It's weighing you down. It's keeping you from fulfilling your promise?"

"My promise?"

"To yourself. To the world. Your dreams are telling you that getting rid of the cow manure in your mind will lead to better things."

Dewey grinned. "That's why my truck has a dump bed, Emily."

"Oh that's wonderful! So you picture the truck tipping up and getting rid of all of it at once?"

"Quite often."

Dewey could hear a lot of pencil scratching on her end of the phone.

"Dewey? Thanks for taking the time to share your feelings with me."

"Why sure, Emily. Any time."

"Sweet dreams, Dewey."

"That won't be a problem, Emily," he said, smiling. "Good night."

[Text from file received from Slim Randles]

Brought to you by Slim's new book and great stocking stuffer, "A Cowboy's Guide to Growing Up Right." Learn more at http://www.nmsantos.com/Slim/Slim.html.