 If I let the video games stay, I can impose rules that will control
the amount of time my children can play them and I can monitor the
appropriateness of these games. They can also be used as a threat
when someone refuses to eat their vegetables. If I eradicate them,
they will go "underground."They are like illegal drugs --
seemingly harmless, but slowly wreaking havoc and impossible to get
rid of without losing control of the situation. The addiction will
seep into every facet of a child's life.
I've seen it happen and could only stand by and watch. No matter
what restrictions I put on them, the path doesn't change.
It starts out with some "dealer" saying, "Try this." The kid will
try because their "dealer" is usually someone they trust, like their
dad, older brother or close friend.
Then, you watch cartoonish animals running around a screen and
falling off buildings. You think, "That's kind of cute. The little
guy is trying to rescue a princess." You think, "It teaches good
values. What's the harm?"
The game keeps him busy and out of your hair, right? What's not
to like?
Then you begin to notice that the games begin to take precedence
over everything else: schoolwork, chores, family game night,
friends... everything.
"It's time for bed."
"Just let me get to a place where I can save the game."
You don't want to be rude, but it apparently takes 15-30 minutes
to arrive at this safe place. Bedtime, which used to be set in
stone, is now suddenly negotiable.
I have taken to pulling out the plug when it takes more than 30
seconds to get to a safe place. They know it and expect it.
It's amazing how fast they get to their safe place now. My
husband warns me about future computer malfunctions caused by
improper shutdowns... Ask me if I care.
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 No matter that I have, long ago, restricted game-playing to a few
hours on the weekend. If we have plans for an outing, the video
games somehow wend their insidious way into those plans.
"OK, I'll help clean up the garage, Mom, after my three hours of
game time. Otherwise, someone else will be on the computer and I
won't have a chance to play."
Well, that wouldn't be very fair, would it?
My children have learned that it is far easier for me to ban
video games for the entire weekend rather than try to schedule our
plans around them.
"We're going to be gone all day?! But I didn't get to play video
games yet!"
Boo-hoo.
I started out not wanting to be rude and trying to accommodate
the interests of my children. After all, I know it would've upset me
if my parents banned the activities I liked to do. Even if they
thought those activities were not good for me, I still would have
been mad.
The fact that my children may be mad at me doesn't seem to bother
me as much as the thought of seeing a virtual weapon in their
virtual hands being used on virtual people.
"But Mom, they're zombies, not real people. They have no brains
or conscience."
It doesn't take long for those cute little cartoon characters to
become zombies, does it? How long will it be before they think I'm a
zombie? How long before the virtual weapon becomes real?
The trick, I think, is to keep them grounded in real life 90
percent longer than they are immersed in a virtual life. At least, I
hope that'll work.
[By LAURA SNYDER]
Laura Snyder is a nationally syndicated columnist,
author and speaker. You can reach her at
lsnyder@lauraonlife.com
or visit www.lauraonlife.com
for more info. |
