If bed-wetting were a n Olympic event, I would be the proud mom of a
gold medalist.My child is good at so many things. He has a
bright, intelligent mind, a loving heart and a beautiful smile...
and he has never had a dry night in his life.
As a mother, I don't want to focus on something that many
consider to be a negative trait. I try not to focus on the sheets
and blankets that need to be washed every day, the millions of
pull-ups I have had to buy, the smell that has embedded itself into
the very walls of my house.
Really, there is so much more to this wonderful child than the
leakage that occurs in his bedroom each night. A loving parent will
try to deal with the situation with as little stress as possible to
the child. After all, it is not his fault.
It does take a toll on the parent, though.
There is the psychological damage of thinking that I'm a lousy
mother because I can't seem to "fix" this issue for him. My other
four children were potty-trained through the night from the age of
3. And although potty-training could not be considered the highlight
of one's life, there is that one moment with each success that you
feel the world bowing in deference to this major accomplishment.
Something tells me that when victory finally comes to me and the
last of my brood, it will be so hard-won that I will expect more
than a bow of deference. I should get a solid gold metal. Certainly,
my boy will have earned one by being the longest running bed-wetter
in history with a perfect record.
"Surely," these other moms with zero bed-wetters would say,
"surely, he should have stopped by now. Have you tried rewards for
each dry night? That worked for me and Junior."
She may have said those words, but I heard, "What is wrong with
you? Why have you let your child go this long without potty-training
him?"
"Rewards would indeed help, you smug blanket-blank, IF he ever
had a dry night!"
Some know-it-all moms say I shouldn't let him drink anything
before he goes to bed; like I've never thought of that before.
My mother-in-law asked why I couldn't use something on the
equivalent of a shock-collar to wake him up -- like they use with
dogs for disobedience.
"Um... because it's... illegal? Besides, he isn't being
disobedient. He can't help it... Do you drown puppies too?"
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 I once bought a sensor to be slipped into his pull-ups. It said
it would detect "moisture" -- I love the way they worded that -- and
wake him up with an alarm that was clipped to his pajamas.
He unplugged it every night because the alarm scared him.
I let him win that battle because he stopped wearing pajamas.
There was nothing left on which to clip the alarm.
I found bed "sheets" about 20 by 20 inches that had sensors to
detect "moisture," but the child twitches and tosses in his sleep as
if he were fighting an army of guerillas... or gorillas... not sure
which. In the mornings I might find him lying sideways across the
bed, hanging over the side of the bed or even curled up under the
bed. That dinky sheet didn't stand a chance of detecting "moisture"
with that kind of aggressive sleeping.
I bought underwear with sensors sewn into them. The wireless
alarm plugs into a wall outlet on the other side of the room.
The idea was that the alarm would wake the child. He would then
get up to push the "off" button on the alarm and head to the
bathroom to finish his... "moisturizing."
I can't expect that level of compliance even when he is wide
awake, but it was my last hope.
The alarm woke the entire household at odd hours of the night,
but he was only slightly disturbed. I shook him awake, pulled him
from the bed, shoved him to the alarm and then pointed him in the
direction of the bathroom.
He did his best, but when I went to wake him, he just stared at
me from the bed. He resisted getting out. After finally leaving the
bed, he cleaned the floor around the alarm, pushed every spot except
the button on the alarm and then looked at me with the stare of a
zombie. When he shuffled into the bathroom, he didn't know what to
do, so he brushed his teeth.
One night the sensor disappeared. If my son were to tell you what
happened, he'd say that the sensor simply jumped off his underwear
and into the toilet. The next morning, we did indeed find it in the
bottom of the toilet, but there is insufficient proof that it
sprouted wings and flew there.
*Sigh* ... I'm looking forward to that gold medal, people.
[By LAURA SNYDER]
Laura Snyder is a nationally syndicated columnist,
author and speaker. You can reach her at
lsnyder@lauraonlife.com
or visit www.lauraonlife.com
for more info. |
