 You may have sent them a so-called "friend request," but in reality,
they are a notch on your Facebook belt. Have you ever noticed that
when your list of Facebook "friends" started growing, your real-life
friends started dwindling? No? That's because you are a Facebook
junkie! You wouldn't notice if your house was on fire!When it is
an imposition to talk to your mother on the phone, because you have
blocked her from seeing your Facebook page, you have a problem.
Believe it or not, the phone is still a viable option for
communication. Face-to-face is even better. And, really? You
defriended your mom?
Does it make sense to post a provocative comment and then check
your Facebook page 146 times a day to find out if any of your
"friends" bit? Why don't you take five minutes out of your obviously
nonexistent life to call them and have that conversation?
I used to have a Facebook page. Yes, I lived that insanity for a
short time. However, there came a time when I realized I didn't have
time to let everyone know how I was feeling or what I was doing
every few minutes. I didn't have time to commiserate with all of
those people who wrote stupid things like "Life sucks!" or "Having a
bad day ..." To be perfectly honest, I don't relate to people who
feel the need to dump on every single person they know with their
"bad day." I always feel compelled to ask, "Compared to... what?"
And apparently, that response is not politically correct.
Speaking of politically correct, when did it become socially
acceptable to talk about politics and religion in mixed company at
30-minute intervals? By mixed company, I mean everyone you know and
possibly everyone they know. Sane people know that speaking about
either of these highly charged subjects in a room full of unrelated
people is uncouth and will invariably lead to broken friendships,
anger and general chaos. And yet the Facebook pages of the world are
full of it. By full of it, I mean the stuff that sits at the bottom
of your great-granddaddy's outhouse.
Don't you dare cite First Amendment rights! Nobody wants to see
your views on these two subjects on their personal page any more
than you want to see theirs. It's like having a political candidate
or Jehovah's Witness ring your doorbell every half-hour. It is
unwanted. Some may say, "Well, don't answer the door." But that
doesn't make it any less annoying. My personal solution to these
onslaughts was the equivalent of not having a "house," thereby
ensuring no "doorbell ringing."
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 Perhaps, before Facebook, the major deterrent was in knowing that
you were sure to get popped in the nose if you incessantly aired
your views in mixed company. Now the only deterrent is being "defriended."
Maybe that's why you defriended your mom? Who cares? You still have
311 more friends!
Have you ever thought about the "real" relationships you are
hurting by broadcasting your every thought onto a global bulletin
board? It's as if everyone has a rare form of Tourette's syndrome!
It's only symptomatic when you post to Facebook! You would never say
certain things to some of your friends in person. Facebook gives you
a kind of deceptive immunity where you think you can safely say
anything you want to everyone you know because you think there are
no consequences.
The time you spend on Facebook, posting and reposting every
unoriginal thought that comes your way, could be better spent
nurturing those few real friendships and relationships that are your
true support.
Inspiration doesn't come in 10-second sound bites, or 150
characters. Inspiration comes from a true connection of spirit that
you can read in someone's eyes and feel in their touch.
Rather than the tired clichés you insist on reposting "so all
your friends can benefit," try taking a walk with someone you love,
giving a hug to a neglected child, shaking the hand of someone you
admire or calling a relative who is far away, just to say "hello."
That is inspiration. That is truth. That is life.
Facebook is a tool. Use it. Don't let it use you. Your Facebook
"friends" should be the people who would be willing to save your
silly life or carry your casket someday. The people who will do that
are right there in front of you. They are the ones who would really
care if you are having a bad day. Invest your time in those people.
[By LAURA SNYDER]
Laura Snyder is a nationally syndicated
columnist, author and speaker. You can reach her at
lsnyder@lauraonlife.com
or visit www.lauraonlife.com
for more info. |
