Slim Randles' Home Country
The fairways are non-existent, and the hazards
… oh, the hazards!
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[October 08, 2016]
It’s
fall, and time once again for the Chipper Invitational Golf
Tournament here in the valley. You remember Chipper, Doc’s imaginary
squirrel? The one who was imaginarily squirrel-napped? |
Doc named the annual golf tournament after good ol’ Chipper. The
tournament is used to raise money for coats for kids who need them.
And it’s only fit and proper it be named for Chipper, since the golf
tournament itself is just about as genuine as the squirrel.
There isn’t a real golf course here in the valley, you know. You
have to go to the city for that. So Doc decided to just wander
around with a shovel, digging holes here and there and putting flags
next to them. The flags, in civilian life, sure look a lot like
metal t-posts.
Another thing that makes Doc’s tournament unique is that there is
absolutely no way to practice for it. That’s because the “golf
course” is usually laid out a day ahead of time each year, and every
fall, Doc picks another spot for it.
The holes are different, the fairways are non-existent, and the
hazards … oh, the hazards. After the first tournament, when one of
Harold Brewster’s cows got hit in the butt, there are no longer any
four-legged ambulatory golf hazards. Farmers are allowed to move
them, happily, into bomb shelters or corrals for the duration of the
madness.
But have you ever tried to hit a golf ball that parked itself
beneath an old, rusty hay baler? Such things make the course …
challenging? Yes, and fun.
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column] |
This year, Doc’s theme was what he called
trans-oceanic. This means, in valley talk, having the tee-boxes on
one side of Lewis Creek and the holes on the other. It will be
interesting to see how many errant golf balls hit the tire swing at
the swimming hole and vanish forever into the depths.
Chipper would approve, I’m sure.
[Text from file received from
Slim Randles]
Ol' Jimmy Dollar
is Slim Randles' first children's book. The book is for kids
K-3rd grades and is even better when parents read it with children.
Ol' Jimmy Dollar makes for sweet dreams and if you have a dog
even better. Available now on Amazon. |