Fostering Grace, from a gift bag to an entire support network
Informational meeting for prospective foster parents to be held Sunday, August 7th

 

[August 01, 2022] 

On Sunday, August 7th, Fostering Grace will host an informational meeting for individuals or families who are considering enrollment in the Illinois Foster Care system to provide temporary homes for children who have been displaced from their biological families.

The event will be hosted at the Crossway Church, 2316 N. Kickapoo Street
in Lincoln, by Fostering Grace founder Jeanna Gill at 4 p.m.

Jeanna and her husband Glenn have been fostering children for the past 10 years, and have adopted children through the DCFS Foster Care program. It was their experiences in the early days of their participation that brought her to form the Fostering Grace project.

Gill explained that she and Glenn were more or less blind-sided one night with an emergency placement. They had about 30 minutes lead time to get ready and when the child was brought to their home, the little girl had nothing but the clothes on her back. Glenn and Jeanna had to scramble quickly to get together the basic necessities for the child, a tough thing to accomplish.

Gill explained that the experience is what brought her to take action, recognizing a gap in the system, and trying to figure out a way to fill it.

She said that when children are placed with a foster parent, there is the probability that there will be financial assistance to provide for the needs of the child, but that assistance does not come automatically. As a matter of fact, it usually takes a few weeks.

In the meantime, the child has needs and sometimes, it is a stretch for a family to accommodate those needs, so Fostering Grace began initially as a provider of material items needed for child care. Over the years, though, it has grown into something a little more complex.

At the beginning, Gill said that her thoughts after the emergency placement she had experienced was the typical “someone needs to do something.” Then it became “I need to do something.” And she did. The first thing she did was come up with what she now refers to as the “Blessing Bag.”

She said she began collecting items and dividing them up into emergency care packages for the children in transition. She said that she still does the bags that are supplied to case workers at the Illinois Department of Child and Family Services as well as the Center for Youth and Family Solutions.

When a child is removed from a dangerous situation at home, the bags are given to the foster family who accepts the child for temporary or long term care. Gill said that she started setting up the bags, designing each one for the specific age level of a child that might be taken into care. She said for example, the needs of an infant are far different from the needs of a teenager. Therefore a baby blessing bag will have bottles, diapers, clothing and other essential material items for the care of an infant. A Teen bag on the other hand in addition to clothing may contain toothbrush and toothpaste, hair brush and comb, daily care products, just whatever might be needed immediately upon arrival at a foster home.
 

The creation of the blessing bags led to other things that Gill found were needed by families, items that couldn’t be placed in a diaper bag or a duffle.

She said that she and Glenn reached the point where that they converted their garage at home to an emergency supply center, containing anything from clothing to beds and toys.

Gill says that she utilizes social media a great deal. She has a facebook page for Fostering Grace and also is part of a social media Foster Parent group page. She posts the needs that she has for children and accepts all kinds of donations for the garage.

When special circumstances arise, she posts on the social media pages and gets almost immediate response. She cited as an example one Christmas Eve when a child was placed with a foster family in an emergency situation. The family was not at all prepared for sheltering an additional child. Gill and others sent out a call for help and Gill says in no time at all, she had a living room full of Christmas gifts to take to the family for their new arrival. Gill said that this was vitally important. When a child is removed from a biological household it is a terrible experience for the child. Regardless of what the home-life circumstances are the separation is extremely traumatic. Giving that child a feeling of well-being in love in the new home is huge. In a moment of terrible trauma, a few Christmas gifts can go a long way to helping that child cope with his or her circumstances.

Gill said that her involvement with the blessing bags, the time spent on social media pages and her personal promotion of the needs of foster families grew into something more. Before she knew it, foster parents were asking her questions about the system and prospective fosters were exploring the ins and outs of becoming temporary caregivers.

The next logical step was to start hosting meetings like the one she has planned for this coming Sunday. Gill said the meetings are a safe environment to ask questions and a great place to dispel myths about foster parenting.

An example of myths, she said that she has had people say they would take a child gladly, but DCFS won’t put a child in a single-parent household. Gill says that is a false assumption. DCFS will indeed place a child in a single parent setting. She said that the agency does not discriminate against marital status, gender or sexual orientation.

Everyone who applies to be foster parents has to go through the DCFS training-orientation and must pass a background check. A DCFS caseworker will visit the home and ascertain that the home has amble space for a child and that it is a safe environment for the child.

Gill says there are other myths that need to be dispelled, and facts that can be shared about the foster parent system. The meeting she hosts will include a caseworker to answer the hard, technical questions about the program and Gill and others will provide personal experience stories and answer questions about the true foster parenting experience.

Gill said that the training-orientation and information provided by DCFS and CYFS is very good. What she does is not aimed at taking away from that training, but rather augmenting it with personal experiences and showing prospective fosters that there is a support system within the foster parent community that can relate to issues they are experiencing them and help new fosters work through those issues.

Because the children who are placed come with their emotional baggage there are times when the task is too much for a foster. Gill says there is no shame in saying that the child is not adjusting well and should be considered for re-location. Gills says that is one of the things that is talked about at the meetings.

Another myth is that if you take a child, you must keep him or her, regardless of the personality clashes or other issues that may arise. That is not correct. She said that she has seen this happen locally and when the child was removed from one foster who was not working out and placed with another, the match was solid and the child adapted well as did the foster family. Gill said that is the ultimate final goal, to assure the health and well-being of the child both physically and emotionally.

These are just a few of the things that are talked about in Gills Fostering Grace meetings. Gill said no question is off limits, and prospective parents should ask anything and everything that comes to mind during the meeting.

Of course, one can’t talk about foster parenting without addressing the elephant in the room, the issues with DCFS that have made the news in the past couple of years. Gill said that she is saddened by what she hears in the news, but she reminds us all that news media sources often thrive on reporting what is bad about a program and omits all the good that counter-balances it.

Her personal experiences with DCFS and CYFS have been remarkably good. She notes that Logan County native Cince Bowns is with the DCFS office. Gill said that she knows firsthand that Bowns has a deep love for all the children she sees come into the system, and she longs to place them in safe secure homes where they can thrive and overcome their traumatic experiences. She added that Bowns is just one example. She sees many caring, loving caseworkers in DCFS and CYFS that want only the best for the children they serve.

There are more than 21,000 children in the foster care system in Illinois. In the central region of the state that includes Logan County there are over 6,000 children in the system. There is a huge need for foster families who will give their hearts to children in distress. Gill said it’s hard sometimes, especially because a child may remain in the home for only a short while, then go back to his or her parents. Families become attached then have to let go and that it tough. But, she said it is the right thing to do because the ultimate goal is to reunite biological families, providing the parents can prove they have a safe and loving environment for their children.

Gill said that making the adjustments, taking a child in, adapting to the new family dynamic, and then letting a child go is “the toughest job you will ever love.” For her it is worth it. It’s worth the joy, it’s worth the pain, it’s worth the tears that are shed, because in the end, it is about saving a child and there is nothing nobler than that.

The meeting on Sunday afternoon at Crossway Church is open to anyone who wishes to learn more about fostering. The meetings are private, and no news media is allowed to attend. Conversations are not related to the public and names of attendees are not released to the public. The meetings are a safe environment for exploring options and talking through issues.

Gill is hopeful that the meeting Sunday will be well attended with people who are genuinely interested in giving love and care to a child in need. She hopes to see many there, and many who will agree to give a child in need a good home in the future.

[Nila Smith]