When I paid
a recent bill, I glanced over the checklist on the envelope and noticed
something different. Along with the usual reminders to sign the check,
include the billing notice, and skip the staples and paper clips, there
was a chore I'd omitted. I'd already written my phone number on the memo
line, but they wanted an18-digit account number instead, so I had to find
a different place for that. The number was so long I almost ran out of
space. "What is this," I thought, "a copying test?"
In olden
days, scribes made copies. Now we have machines to do such things, or at
least I thought we did.
To top it
off, it was one of those numbers with a string of zeros at the beginning.
I can't always tell at a glance how many there are. When I see them in a
customer number on an order form, for example, I usually figure that a few
less or a few more nothings in front won't make that much difference, as
the closing digits are surely the ones that count. However, for the sake
of accuracy, I get out my fingernail and move it along from zero to zero,
counting as I go, in order to determine the exact number so I can
reproduce them somewhere else.
Another
recent numerical encounter was unwelcome for its lack of explanatory
words, although it came from no less than a book publisher. I received a
statement about account credits and debits on CO2501419, CO2501419 and
CM335238. From that, I couldn’t tell what I had bought. A number by any
other name might have actually said what it was talking about. The word
"publishing" in the company name at the top of the paper was a
clue to what the listings meant, but there had been mix-ups with book
orders from different publishers at about the same time (eight months
ago), so I had to check the company names in the books themselves to
figure out which billing story still needed an ending according to the
numbers in their records, though not according to the numbers in mine.
Then there
was the Sunday afternoon when I decided to use a pre-paid phone card that
was due to expire on — you guessed it: another number — 01/31/2001.
Considering all the numerals involved in the card process, I typed and
stored an 11-digit toll-free number, a 13-digit PIN and the 10-digit phone
number I wished to contact. Then I called an 11-digit number, different
from the customary relay number which I have conveniently stored in the
phone memory, before sending the memo with the other 34 numerals. If I had
wanted to make it more interesting, I could have included 26 additional
digits for the PINs on two other cards with a few minutes remaining. Then
I could have talked a little longer and finished all three cards, but it
hardly seemed worth the effort to type the digits.
It's not
unusual for people to lament or joke about the proliferation of
identifying numbers required to do everyday business. To function
efficiently in today's society, people memorize numbers including security
system and lock codes, ATM PINs, computer passwords, Social Security
number, home and work phone numbers, and numbers in addresses.
Most of us
have learned to keep the most basic alphanumeric combinations in mind and
let automation handle the rest. In fact, I've come to depend on
computerized storage of so many numbers for telephoning and mailing that I
occasionally wonder if I have enough of them stored in my own memory so
that I could get by in an emergency situation when I might not have access
to any such information stored electronically or on paper.
Enumerating
the problem on a personal level, I estimated that the primary groups of
digits I keep on the tip of my tongue and on my fingertips total 100 to
150 numerals. I also carry around a mental collection of expired numbers,
such as ZIP codes where I no longer live and even my dad's Social Security
number, which I may have memorized before my own (in order to be one of
his backup number-retrieval systems) and which includes enough
similarities to mine to keep me entertained and second-guessing myself
ever since.
Until my
mind goes blank numerically or until biometric identification takes over
with intimate knowledge of my iris, retina, voice characteristics, or the
geometry of my hands or my head, wherein the routine numbers are stored,
such retrieval will probably continue to be second nature, so I suppose a
mere 18-digit copy job isn't a No. 1 problem.
I still think there should be a
better way, but I wouldn't count on it yet.