Laura on Life

We are family

By Laura Snyder

[November 25, 2008]  This holiday season, what I wish for every human being on the planet is that everyone gets to spend some time with their family. Even more, I would wish that every person on the planet had a family. It doesn't matter how that family is shaped or how lopsided the family tree is. Some family trees are missing whole limbs and sometimes the boughs may break, but family is a unit made up of precious bonds that must be protected and cherished.

I imagine that the poorest people in the world are those who have no family. How bereft one would feel if not for a sibling who makes fun of your boyfriends, a grandmother who spoils you with cookies that fizzle in your mouth because they have too much baking soda in them, or an aunt who used to say, "My, how you've grown!" every time she saw you. How incredibly bleak life would seem without a mom who insisted on rubbing that foul-smelling Vapo-Rub on your chest when you had a cold or a grandpa who recalled the "good old days" whenever you mentioned e-mail or cell phones.

What I wouldn't give to see, just once more, my father's scowl when I backed into our trash cans while he was teaching me how to drive 30 years ago.

I define family as being those people who would, to the exclusion of all others, tell you things you don't really want to hear.

They tell you when you're being a jerk, when you need to change jobs, when you have treated someone badly, and when your feet stink.

They would tell you about something hanging out of your nose or if the tag on the back of your shirt was waving in the breeze like a flag on the Fourth of July. They will, of course, roll their eyes and make you feel like an idiot, but they do that so they won't have to punch someone else's lights out when they dared to try that.

Your family is your barometer for measuring how the rest of the world may see you. They magnify our faults to the nth degree so that our partly blind, partly narcissistic eyes can see those faults and possibly try to correct them. Family members are the only people in the world who don't care if they tick you off, and therefore, they are the only ones who will tell you the truth when you ask, "Does this make me look fat?"

Only family would brush the dandruff off your shoulders and tell you never to wear black because it looked as if a mini-blizzard had touched down on your shoulders.

No one else would say, "You got a little sauce on your cheek," and then watch in amusement as you tried to eradicate the imaginary spot.

"A little to the left. No, your other left. Higher. It's still there. Try using some water from your glass. Nope. You missed again. OK, you can stop now."

"Did I get it?"

"Get what?"

Of all the blessings in my life, the one I am most grateful for is my family: the true constants in my life, the stalwart distributors of truth in a world of politically correct pretenders.

To my family: I love and cherish each and every one of you, very, very much.

To those who have no family: You are cordially invited to be part of mine.

[By LAURA SNYDER]

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