 We had three channels on our tube TV, and people were skinnier
because you had to get up to change the channel. The one video game
was a green blip bouncing from one side of the screen to the other.
Playing outside for hours was preferable to watching little green
blips.Our telephone actually needed to be dialed on a real dial,
and long-distance calls were a once-a-year family event. It was
cheaper to send a letter. Our dishwasher was a top-loader that was
used only during the holidays.
My mom didn't work outside the home until we were teenagers, so
the house was always spotless, and I never once saw dust on the
furniture, socks under the couch, Legos in the heater ducts or
crunchy kitchen towels.
Fast-forward 30-some odd years: a new day, a new age of
technology that was supposed to make things simpler and easier.
I wake up to the sound of a digital alarm clock screeching
whatever channel it was left on after a child played with it. My
husband left for work early, but the coffee maker turns on
automatically and brews a fresh pot of coffee even when he isn't
there to drink it. How many times do I have to tell him to inform
the coffee maker if he's not going to be home?
Walking to school isn't an option because of the multitudes of
dangerous types lurking around every corner. If a child gets hurt or
abducted, the parents are charged with neglect.
The kids must have a backpack to carry their books or they are
considered underprivileged and are automatically put on the list of
kids to report to social services if they so much as arrive with
their shirt on backward.
We have 5 billion channels on our flat-screen, high-definition,
remote-controlled TV, which comes equipped with at least six more
boxes, each with its own remote control. These are primarily for
manipulating the available shows so that we won't miss anything. If
there were only three channels, chances are, we wouldn't miss a
thing.
Video games are now so lifelike that kids can actually get
hands-on experience with stealing cars, shooting people and being
the tyrannical ruler of an entire country. With that kind of
edu-tainment available, who'd want to play outside?
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 Telephones have changed as well. They are now untethered, and
"dialing" now involves pushing buttons, much like a TV remote. In
fact, if you use your telephone in the same room as you view
television, it is a common hazard to find yourself trying to dial
the remote and change channels with your telephone. After yelling,
"Hello, hello!" into your remote a few times, it starts to make more
sense to handle your communications by e-mail.
The same technological snafu occurs when I try to bring my
laundry to a boil in the dryer. What can I say? The knobs are in the
same position as my stove.
Our dishwasher is run daily. In fact, I don't think my children
know how to wash dishes by hand. Although the dishwasher is supposed
to save time, it seems to take them longer to do the dishes because
of the negotiations beforehand. Who's on load, and who's on unload?
No matter how it turns out, I always find dried noodles and twist
ties in the bottom of the dishwasher.
Most women work outside the home now. Some work two jobs, and the
so-called division of labor that supposedly occurs in most marriages
… is just a myth. As a matter of fact, it's a joke.
As a result, peanut butter can always be found smeared on various
surfaces; cupboard doors stay permanently open until I enter the
kitchen; and socks are not only found under the couch, but in the
fireplace, the dishwasher, the broom closet, under beds, attached to
the inside of sweaters and clinging to a ceiling fan.
So, too, crunchy towels are commonplace, even though paper towels
are more readily available for Kool-Aid spills.
As you can see, life is different, but not necessarily easier. I
can hardly wait to see how "easy" my daughter's life is with the
technology that is sure to be available when she grows up.
[By LAURA SNYDER]
You can reach the writer at
lsnyder@lauraonlife.com.
Or visit www.lauraonlife.com
for more columns and info about her books. |
