While U.S. headlines in 2013 were dominated by the Boston Marathon
bombs, Edward Snowden leaking government secrets, and the disastrous
rollout of President Barack Obama's healthcare reform law, the news
also brought plenty to laugh about.
In the category of "Politicians Behaving Badly," former Congressman
Anthony Weiner's campaign to become mayor of New York City tanked
when news broke that the Democrat, who resigned from Congress in
2011 after a sexting scandal, was at it again — this time using the
name "Carlos Danger." The X-rated déjà vu inspired a play called
"The Weiner Monologues.
On the West Coast, San Diego Mayor Bob Filner made the headlines
with what came to be known as the "Filner Headlock." After asking a
woman for a date, he came up behind her and wrapped one arm around
her in an embrace that was more World Wrestling Entertainment than
Kama Sutra. Sexual harassment accusations followed — from nearly 20
other women, resulting in Filner's resigning, getting sued and being
sentenced to home confinement.
A foot-in-mouth moment occurred on the November night Massachusetts
state Senator Marty Walsh was elected mayor of Boston. As new mayor
Walsh prepared to greet supporters, another Marty Walsh — a Boston
public affairs consultant — saw an unfamiliar 202 number pop up on
his cell phone.
"Congratulations, Marty, you son of a gun. You did it!" he heard the
voice of the U.S. vice president shout gleefully, before he realized
his mistake.
In October, the federal government shutdown led to some strange
stories, including the blackout of the wildly popular online Giant
Panda Cam at the National Zoo in Washington and the furloughing of
poison ivy-eating goats in New Jersey and New York.
Months later, the fumbled launch of Healthcare.gov whipped up a
search for the "Obamacare Girl," who was re-named "Glitch Girl"
after her smiling face remained frozen on the home page that
frustrated millions of computer users.
In the sports world, former Notre Dame linebacker Manti Te'o put a
new twist on the old adage that it is better to have loved and lost
than never to have loved at all. Romantics were drawn to the tale of
his devotion to Lennay Kekua and her tragic death from cancer — until her very existence was exposed as a fraud. The snarky
Twittersphere was flooded with photos of people "Te'oing" — hugging
empty chairs or puckering up in an otherwise empty room.
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Broken hearts were mended after a New Jersey commercial fisherman
lost $12,000 in cash he had saved to buy an engagement ring. His
backpack had a faulty zipper and the money fell out as he rode his
motorcycle to the docks. Much of the loose cash was scooped up, but
after the story came out, good Samaritans returned it to him.
Elsewhere on the Jersey Shore, Wildwood officials banned saggy pants
on the boardwalk, pressing their crusade for decency with the threat
of a $200 fine for pants that sag more than three inches below the
waist. To those who invoked their right to wear low-slung pants,
Mayor Ernie Troiano Jr. said: "I have a right not to look at your
rear end.
Animals acting up got their share of attention in 2013. A
foul-mouthed Rhode Island cockatoo landed its owner in trouble by
cursing at a next-door neighbor, who happened to be the girlfriend
of the owner's ex-husband. The City of Warwick initially slapped the
woman with a $15 fine for the bird's salty language, but eventually
dropped the case.
In Colorado, a man on his way to his brother's wedding 600 miles
away in Utah was arrested for being drunk while riding his horse. He
had a small dog in his backpack.
As the year drew to a close, an African flamingo that had been on
the lam for eight years after escaping from a zoo in Wichita,
Kansas, was spotted this month cavorting with a companion in the
Gulf of Mexico off the Texas coast. Flamingos pair up for life, but
the gender of these two birds was unknown, a zoo official said.
(Editing by Scott Malone and Gunna Dickson)
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