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Some contend this is an innocent payment for the cost of a wedding dress and the elaborate wedding feasts Roma favor. Others call it is the price families are willing to pay for their sons to win a woman believed to be a virgin. "We are maintaining the morals of the children by marrying them off at a young age," said Kosta Kostov, a spectator at the fair. "If she's not a virgin, the bride's family has to give the money back." He said Bulgaria's crushing financial slowdown, and the near total collapse of the coppersmith industry, has made it virtually impossible for his family to raise the money needed to find wives for his three grandsons, aged 18, 20 and 22. "They have no jobs and their parents can't pay money to the bride's family," he said. "It's a crisis now." The idea that a young woman must be a virgin when she marries has generally faded in many segments of Bulgarian society during the last 50 years. But it remains strong among the tradition-minded Roma, particularly those who follow Orthodox teachings. The Kalaidzhi, unlike other Roma communities, do not allow girls to marry at an extremely young age
-- most are 18 or older. And they have started to modernize: It is widely recognized that the young people need to have feelings for each other. "That is the first and most important step now," said Krastev, a member of the Bulgarian Academy of Sciences. "In the past, parents didn't ask the young people whether they liked each other. But the second step is that when they have decided they like each other and the parents agree, they start negotiating what the price will be for the bride." Talk of brides being sold causes bristling among the Kalaidzhi, who represent a small proportion of Bulgaria's 700,000 Roma. They say the marriage fair is a tradition that actually works, keeping communities and extended families intact for generations. Indeed, it is easy to find men and women in their late 30s and early 40s who met at a bridal fair two decades ago and today are hoping now to make matches for their children. Many who found a mate here five or six years ago come back to help their younger siblings or cousins get hitched. Pepa Georgieva married her husband Kolyo in 2008 after a courtship sparked at the bridal fair. She came to this year's event to help her 20-year-old cousin navigate the sea of suitors. "She is nervous and there are several grooms possible," Georgieva said. "She has not decided, and she can't decide by herself. We are asking her opinion but she also has to recognize our opinion." That opinion doesn't hinge on the groom alone. "I am here to meet the families," she said -- "to see if they have the wealth to support the bride."
[Associated
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