Slim Randles' Home Country
Dental drama
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[May
18, 2013]
Those of us who
call this little valley home have a unique blessing in the form of
Perry, our dentist. Yes, when we go to get the fangs fixed up at
O'Dontall Dental, down in the old brick building near the office of
the Valley Weekly Miracle, the grinding and scraping and numbing and
lip shaking is accompanied by ... well ... acting. |
You see, Perry worked his way through dental school by treading the
boards ... acting on stage, that is. When all was said and done and
he received his final mouth mirror, he'd become a darn fine dentist,
and could quote Shakespeare and others at the drop of a hat. And
he'd even drop the hat for you. It was like that for Dud recently,
when he went in for his six-month checkup and polish job.
"Ah, Dudley," Perry said, peering into his mouth, "the years have
favored you kindly in the mouth department. Very little cleaning to
do."
"Ahhhks," Dud said.
"You're welcome. Here's a scraper on number six, however. I can
only say, as I scrape ... out, out damned spot! Leave and take with
thee the spectre of decay! Begone and tarry no more to add to the
misery of my boon companion!"
[to top of second
column] |
Dr. O'Dontall sometimes uses his native Irish accent to emphasize
things, as well.
"'Tis brushing after every meal you be, Dudley, my eyes tell me
true..."
"Errrrrt"
"That's right fine, lad, right fine. And thanking you kindly for
years to come your mouth will be, for efforts now lead to years of
chewing free ..."
"Ahhhks," Dud mumbled.
"You're welcome."
Perry doesn't even charge extra for this.
[Text from file received from
Slim Randles]
Brought to you by the award-winning
book “Home Country,” available at
http://nmsantos.com/Books/Home/Home.html. The book "Home Country," a column
collection, has received the annual humor award given by the New
Mexico Press Women. It earlier won the New Mexico/Arizona book
award. “Makes a guy kinda proud,”
says Randles. |