Slim Randles' Home Country

Should’ve known better’n to buy a flesh-colored shirt

[September 08, 2015]  There are a few universal truths in our lives: the sun comes up in the east, it rains in Ketchikan, and you can tell what the weather’s like by eavesdropping on the senior members of the world dilemma think tank … meeting daily at the Mule Barn coffee shop since God made dirt.

“My hens,” said Doc, “were sweating this morning.”

“Now Doc,” said Steve, “you know chickens don’t sweat.”

“Tell that to my hens,” he said.

Dud Campbell looked up. “My shirt blistered yesterday. Couldn’t help it. I should’ve known better’n to buy a flesh-colored shirt.”

“Bring it by the office later, Dud, and I’ll put something on it.”

“Salve?”

“Yes, we might be able to salve it.”

Bert hit Doc squarely with a cracker packet.

“Reminds me of the summer when it didn’t rain,” Bert said.

“We’ve never had a summer when it didn’t rain,” said Doc.

“I know. I think this may be the one.”

It’s true this has been a hot, dry summer here in Home Country. A few wells have begun to dry up, actually, and the local farmers and ranchers are sweating blood as well as sweat.

“We might seed some clouds,” Bert said. Bert inflicts his retirement on his friends by reading up on scientific stuff.

“I’ve got the seeds if you’ve got the clouds, Bert.”

“You know what I mean. They can fly up in a cloud and put chemicals in them, and cause it to rain.”

“You seen any clouds lately?” said Steve, our owlish cowboy.

“There is that,” Doc added.

And then, before Dud could start telling about the lizards carrying canteens, they all asked Loretta for refills … on their iced teas.

[Text from file received from Slim Randles]

Ol' Jimmy Dollar is Slim Randles' first children's book.  The book is for kids K-3rd grades and is even better when parents read it with children.  Ol' Jimmy Dollar makes for sweet dreams and if you have a dog even better.  Available now on Amazon.