Slim Randles' Home Country
The Duchess, the driver, and Dudley's dilemma
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[October 02, 2017]
Dud
had been sitting there looking at his computer for 20 minutes and he
hadn’t gotten any more done on the book. You know the one. Dud calls
it “Murder in the Soggy Bottoms,” and the rest of us call it “The
Duchess and the Truck Driver” because the two main characters are ….
yeah, you understand. |
The rest of us have only been able to look on
while our pal Dudley has been going through this agony for the past
several years. If we’re asked to explain the book to those not in
the literary loop around here, we generally hem and haw and say
something like, “I think the duchess and the truck driver love each
other, and there’s some murders in it, too.”
At least, that tends to be a summation of the main theme, because we
can’t see the book from Dud’s perspective. To Dud, this is the next
“War and Peace” but he doesn’t want it to be that long. Also, to
Dud, sitting there at his computer now for 26 minutes, he has no
idea what his characters would do for 800 pages. He is still trying
to figure out how to keep them busy for 300, and that hasn’t come
easily.
You see, the truck driver (he’s a handsome guy, of course) is on
special assignment to the European country where the duchess
(naturally drop-dead gorgeous) lives. Dud hasn’t figured out the
special assignment yet, either, but it beats having his hero haul
groceries in the middle of the United States. And the duchess, well,
turns out she had a love child by the truck driver when he was over
there 20-some years ago on his last special assignment. And the
truck driver doesn’t know he has a European son, but the duchess
knows. Well, of course the duchess knows. I mean, she was there as
the dukelet’s mom all those years, right?
[to top of second
column] |
So how do we reconnect them?
Well, maybe his truck could accidently crash into her castle?
Or she could open a truck wash down at the truck stop … no, that
doesn’t seem duchess-like. But Dud’s been sitting here looking at
his computer for half an hour now. Know what? There’s a football
game coming on television.
Later on, maybe ...
[Text from file received from
Slim Randles]
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