“Called it The Ideas of March, you know,” Windy
said to those whose wheelchairs weren’t quick enough to make the
hallway.
“Now the object of their evilness on the Ideas of March was none
other than Julius Caesar hisself. You know. He was so famous his
face is on gold coins in old dead boats on the bottom of the ocean.
And a-course you know they named a food after him, don’t ya? Thass
right. We all heard of Orange Julius.
“Well, on this partic’lar Ideas of March, Ol’ Julius was s’posed to
give a speech there in Rome to all them senators and tell ‘em what a
great guy he was, and how great his ecumenicals was workin’ out for
the middle classers and who he thought they should conquer next. But
that wasn’t gonna happen, nossir, ‘cuz them senators who didn’t like
him was waitin’ for him at the front door of the farm … called this
here buildin’ the farm, for some reason … and they flat sicced a
temper tyrannus on him, which meant they stuck daggers in him, right
through his bathrobe, and he fell down.
“And while he was busy a-dyin’ he noticed one of them stabbers was
his ol’ trail pard, name of Brutal. And with his dyin’ breath,
Julius managed to say, “Brutal ol’ boy, don’t tell me you was in on
this deal, too? But a-course he said it in Roman, so it come out
more like “Et tu Buffet?” [to top of second
column] |
“They used ta talk like that.
But anyway, that was the Ideas of March for that year, anyhow, and
ol’ Julius Caesar went on to orange juice fame and havin’ movies and
plays wrote about him.
“But I still think “Et tu Buffet” would be a pretty good ol’ name
for a Roman coffee shop, and you can tell ‘em I said so.”
They’d all made it to safety by that time except for one old lady
whose aluminum walker had broken its leg and had to be put down.
[Text from file received from
Slim Randles]
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