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 Speaking in detail of how he
failed to deal with her loss for more than a
decade, Harry says in a new TV documentary
series that the fear of also losing his wife
Meghan was one of the main reasons the couple
quit their royal duties and moved to California
last year.
"My mother was chased to her death when she was
in a relationship with someone who wasn't white,
and now look what's happened. You're talking
about history repeating itself? They're not
going to stop until she dies," Harry says in the
mental health documentary series "The Me You
Can't See."
"It's incredibly triggering to potentially lose
another woman in my life," he added, referring
to Meghan. The "Me You Can't See" series, which
Harry produced with U.S. talk show host Oprah
Winfrey, is released on Apple TV+ on Friday.
Princess Diana died in 1997 at age 36 in a crash
in Paris after the car in which she was
traveling with her Egyptian-born boyfriend Dodi
Fayed was chased by paparazzi. Harry was 12
years old.
Harry, whose American wife Meghan is bi-racial,
spoke of racist reporting in the mainstream
British press about his wife, as well as abuse
on social media. Meghan has said her experience
in Britain drove her to thoughts of suicide when
she was pregnant with their first son Archie.
In the documentary, Harry spoke of walking
behind Diana's coffin through the streets of
London with his brother William, father Prince
Charles and uncle Charles Spencer.
"The thing I remember most was the sound of the
horses' hooves going along the Mall," he said.
"It was like I was outside of my body, just
walking along, doing what was expected of me,
showing one tenth of the emotion that everyone
was showing."
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 Years earlier, he recalled
sitting in the back of his mother's car while
she, in tears, was pursued by photographers.
"One of the feelings that comes up for me always
is the helplessness. Being a guy and being too
young to help a woman, in this case your mother,
and that happened every single day," he said.
Harry said he buried his feelings, but drank
heavily and suffered panic attacks and anxiety
in his 20s, and still freaks out when he sees
cameras. "I was so angry with
what happened to her (Diana) and the fact there
was no justice at all... the same people that
chased her through that tunnel photographed her
dying on the back seat of that car," he said.
"The clicking of cameras, and the flash of
cameras makes my blood boil. It makes me angry.
It takes me back to what happened to my mum,
what I experienced as a kid."
Even now, at age 36, he said that returning to
London makes him feel tense and hunted.
Harry said he started serious therapy almost
five years ago, when he met Meghan.
"I quickly established that if this relationship
was going to work, I had to deal with my past,"
he said. The couple married in May 2018.
(Reporting by Jill Serjeant, Editing by Rosalba
O'Brien)
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