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 “Happy
May Day!” said Delbert McLain, our self-appointed, undisputed, and
unpaid head of our non-existent chamber of commerce. He wears a tie.
Here, in this town. ‘Nuf said.
“By golly you’re right,” said Doc. “I have a question, Del. How are
we supposed to celebrate it?”
“By starting a business, maybe,” he said. “You know. And then
joining the chamber of commerce.”
“And paying dues?”
“Why not?”
“Well,” said Dud, our budding novelist, still using small buds, “how
about erecting a May pole and then dancing around it waving flowers
and yelling ‘hooray for May’? They used to do that.”
There’s lots of ways of celebrating the beginning of
May, it turns out. In some places it was a drunken orgy and actually
gave us the word orgies. In some areas in ancient times, it was time
to chase girls around flowering trees and be fruitful. [to top of second
column] |
If you were too old to do that,
simply singing spring songs like they did at Walpurgis and Beltane
would be on the menu. Well, to be fair, at Beltane, the Scots and
Irish used to burn their fields and turn the cows out to pasture,
too.
Then of course, you could pick up the microphone on the jet’s
dashboard and yell “Mayday!” to the tower and have them sympathize
with you as you plunge downwards.
Or, of course, if you’re of a communistic state of mind, you could
always bump off a czar or two and start your own government.
Pretty girls, new flowers and May poles sound like more fun than
dead czars and plane crashes. Orgy, anyone?
[Text from file received from
Slim Randles]
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