2018 Home for the Holidays

2018 Home for the Holidays LINCOLN DAILY NEWS November 21, 2018 Page 39 T hat dreaded time of year is upon us again; Christmas time. The time of year when the weather is cold, the sun goes out at five 0’clock, and the stores skip over Thanksgiving in a mad rush to paint the shelves red and green. Those of you who are constant readers of my annual thoughts on Christmas know just how much I dislike the holiday season. But there is one thing about Christmas that I don’t find quite as exasperating - it’s scheduled. I know exactly what days the stores will be closed. I know what time to be at my family’s home to open more gifts I will later struggle to find room for. I know what days I will leave to travel out of town and when I will (finally) be home again. I know which presents I have asked for, and are likely to receive. I know just how much food to eat, and how much will sit uneaten in my refrigerator (and eventually end up in the trash- I’ve always been bad at leftovers). But every year, as I mentally prepare myself and meticulously sort through my schedule, something goes horribly wrong. There’s always a surprise. Ironically, it should not surprise anyone to learn I dislike surprises. Dislike may not be the best word, but I cannot think of any other words to attribute to the feeling that erupts in my chest as someone inevitably reveals a surprise over Christmas packaging. Throwing off my schedule like this only serves to heighten my anxiety. At least give a guy some warning. Tell me at Thanksgiving that you’ll have a surprise at Christmas; that should do it. Surprises at Christmas can take a few different shapes, and each one brings with it a special flavor of heartburn. A change in menu For some families, Christmas is a rehash of Thanksgiving when it comes to food. I don’t see the point to such a strategy; didn’t we just eat turkey and ham? Why are we doing this again so soon? Is this a secret stash of leftovers I didn’t know about? Curmudgeon - don’t like surprises, even during the holidays Christmas Continued u