|
A:
Some children are naturally outgoing, while others seem to lack
confidence in themselves. Although you can't change your child's
basic personality, you can help her feel more comfortable speaking
to and working with others. Here are some things you can do:
-
Start by talking with your
daughter's teacher. By now, she may have recognized your child's
shyness. Ask what she is doing in school to help your daughter
learn to work with others. Ask to visit the class to watch your
daughter. Afterward, compare notes with the teacher. Together,
you can develop a plan to help your daughter.
-
Shy children don't always know
what to say to another child. Role-playing can help. Say, "Let's
pretend you're on the playground. Jennifer and Katie are playing
a game that you'd like to join. What could you say?" At first,
you might have your child pretend to be the other children. You
can pretend to be her. But then switch roles and give her a
chance to play herself.
-
Look for books about friends.
Talk about what good friends do -- and don't do. As your
daughter thinks about what makes a good friend, she may start to
look for people in her class who can be her friend.
-
Avoid labeling your child "shy."
She'll think there's something wrong with her. Then she'll be
even more timid. Ease your child into meetings with strangers.
Greet and talk with people new to your child. Simply let her
observe. Once she knows these are "parent-approved" people, she
might feel more comfortable.
[to top of second column in this article] |
-
Never put your child on the spot.
Get her consent in advance if you want her to perform for
Grandma. Avoid talking for your child. Give your child time to
share her feelings and concerns.
-
Build on your daughter's
strengths. Use these as a way for her to meet other children who
share her interests. Does she like music? Perhaps she could sing
in a children's choir. Is she athletic? She might want to play
on a soccer team. As your child practices skills that she
enjoys, she will develop self-confidence. This may help her make
friends with other children who share those interests.
Remember that shy people often make great listeners. This can
help her in school -- and throughout life.
[The Parent
Institute]
For more information about helping
children learn or to submit your own question, go to
http://advisor.parent-institute.com. All questions will receive
a prompt answer by e-mail.
Copyright 2005, The Parent
Institute.
"Ask the Learning Advisor -- Ideas for Raising Successful
Children" is a free, syndicated column from the Parent Institute.
|
